What a difference a smile makes.

This morning I felt as if I were cheating.  I had a free coffee waiting at our local Sheetz – and with two kids heading off to college in a few months, I need to save wherever possible. So I grabbed my morning caffeine at Sheetz. McDonald’s in my area has free coffee every Monday and I always stop and grab a large cup.  On Mondays that I really feel flush, I’ll buy a breakfast burrito – I’m not a total mooch. Just poor.  But I have to say, I’m tempted to stop at McDonald’s every morning during the week.  Not because I love their coffee (which I do), but because of the fantastic service I receive in the drive-through.  I’m always treated kindly. Always.  And it makes my day.  It seems so little that the ordertaker – or the person who hands me my order – takes a second to smile at me and that it makes such a big difference in my day.  But it does.  Which isn’t to say that the folks at Sheetz aren’t nice because they are.  But they are busy and there are always people in line.  At McDonald’s however, for a split second, it is just the ordertaker and me.  Eye contact. Personal connection. Whatever. We smile at each other and say ‘have a good day’.  And it’s the best.

Chicken hell.

There was chaos in the chicken world this morning.  Daisy and Donald (the ducks belonging to the neighbors) spent the night in the milk house which is the chickens’ bedroom of choice. Apparently the chickens didn’t notice until they woke up.  I was outside when it all went down………there was a flurry of chickens bolting out of the milk house, squawking and carrying-on.  Then Daisy and Donald slowly waddled out and plopped themselves about 10 feet away from the door.  It only got worse from there ----- the confusion because of the ducks lead to the chickens running into the basement to eat the catfood which really pissed off the cats.  The cats then were following me and meowing (as if I could do anything).  I finally had to chase the chickens out of the basement, away from the cat food and back to the milk house (sneaking past the ducks) with a can of chicken feed.  Everyone seemed happy – until I left for work and noticed two little white duck tails sticking out of the milk house and the chickens all standing outside again.  With this kind of drama, I’m glad to be at work.

Now you see me

I've written before about being middle-aged, being invisible.  On one hand, it is great being invisible. I can do really stupid things and no one notices. After all, if you've seen one grey-haired old woman, you've seen them all!  It's great to be invisible because I can dress for comfort and not for style. But then, even when I was young, I never dressed for style.  But now that I have put on a few pounds, comfort is even more important.  But sometimes, being invisible sucks. Sometimes I want to be noticed. Sometimes I just want to scream  "I used to be something! I used to be smart! I used to be important!"  I've often thought of making a T-shirt that said "it's ok to smile at me" just because I was tired of people looking through me instead of at me.

Grand Illusion - Bonnie Hunter's 2014 mystery quilt

I think that's what I like about quilting.  I can hide behind my quilts: literally and figuratively!   I can post on facebook and get likes and comments and no one seems to think I'm icky because I'm old/fat/ugly/out-of-style.  In return, many times I don't know the maker of the person behind the quilt that I am liking and commenting on. But sometimes I would like to see her or him.  When I think of other quilters, I imagine happy, smiling people. Intellectually, I know that isn't the truth.

I know for a fact that many quilters have experienced unmentionable heartache and often times, they deal with that heartache by putting needle to fabric and making a thing of beauty that also provides comfort.
I think for many of us, quilting is a way of providing comfort to ourselves or to ourselves through others.  I think quilting for me, is a way to express beauty - to have something that is still beautiful about me.  It is a way to feel connected to others in a way I never have except through books.  For much the same reason, it's why I like facebook.  I don't have to respond in an instant.  I have time to thoughtfully prepare an answer the truly reflects my feelings.  I have a choice of who is allowed into my life but yet have the option of keeping them at an arm's distance.   
So I've started this blog that is about quilting and thimbles (I really like thimbles and thimble-related words - and I can't figure out why people think I'm odd). It's also about sticks because I live out in the sticks with my chickens and my goats and my pony and cats and dogs.